Failure Is Not The End

Women, like men, should try to do the impossible. And when they fail, their failure should be a challenge to others. Amelia Earhart

Post written and copyright by Doris McCraw










Today at work I had an interesting conversation with a couple. They were fun and gracious. The subject of trying new things, having more than one career became part of the short interlude we shared. It made me remember my parents. They were unique and probably the perfect parents for someone like me. They themselves were far from perfect, but the gifts they gave to their daughter were priceless.

I lost my father in 1978 and my mother in 2011.  I miss them, but also realize they accomplished much in their lives.

I would watch my father maneuver the ins and outs of company and family politics. He did not always succeed, but more times than not, he was able to straddle a fence without getting hurt.  Everyone seemed to like him, and looking back, I believe it was his ability to see both sides and not judge the players in the game to harshly.  To illustrate: I once came home hurt by what someone had said about me.  My father looked at me and calmly said, ” Many times people say hurtful things because they wish they had what you had. They are probably jealous.”

My mother was another type altogether. You did not mess with this lady. She would tell you what she thought, and did not suffer fools gladly. She once told me, “People think I am not being tactful, but if they knew what was in my mind they would realize how tactful I truly am.”

Of all the wonderful and sometimes painful memories I have. The greatest and most precious memory I believe is the conversations with both, individually and together, was the constant reinforcement of the idea that I could do whatever, be whoever I chose. They did not place limits on my abilities. The only requirement they had  was that I be happy and accept responsiblity for my decisions. They made me understand that everything had a consequence, that the consequence was neither good nor bad, it was what I made with those consequences that would make me the person I would become.

So to my mother and father, I thank you for the gift of my music, my writing, my career in corrections, my friendships and my love of life. I think you did a pretty good job. As the quote above says, sometimes you fail, but that failure should be the challenge to try again.

I shall leave you with a quote from Plato: Let parents bequeath to their children not riches, but the spirit of reverence. A reverence for the possibilities of life, where failure is not the end.

Cover for Home For His Heart


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16 thoughts on “Failure Is Not The End

  1. Wonderful post Doris! I liked the quotes from Amelia Earhart and Plato. However, your post is both touching and empowering. What great parents you had! To instill in a child the confidence that he or she can do anything is the most precious gift a parent can give. We all fail sometimes but it’s the courage to get back up and try again that makes us successes in life. You’ve turned out to be an amazing woman of many talents and I’m sure your parents would be very proud!


    1. Linda,
      You hit upon the most precious memory I have, they were always proud, proud that I tried. I was lucky, very lucky. Doris


  2. Doris, my Mom always pushed me beyond limits, and believed in everything I said or did. She thought I was so special. My dad worked away a lot, but we had a lot of fun when he was home. Cher’ley


    1. Cher’ley, It sounds like you have some great memories like myself. It is such a gift to remember why we are they wonderful people we have become. Doris


    1. Kathy,

      I confess I use the same statement many times in my work.

      I was lucky. They were the perfect parents for me. I’m not sure they would have been for some of the other folks in my life, but I have been very thankful, despite a ‘tough’ childhood. (illness, etc.) Doris


    1. Thank you Stephanie. I think in addition to the other gifts, there was the big one of following through, although I will admit it sometimes takes me a while to get traction. Smile. Doris


  3. My mother once told me that even with myt visual impairment, I could be anything I wanted, except maybe a brain surgeon. I never strived for that, but I failed many times. That`s life.

    Sent from my iPad



  4. Lovely post, Doris. My mother had more specific expectations of me but as she’s grown older, she likes where I’ve ended up. What great memories of your parents. Thanks for a great post.


    1. Thank you Erin. As I have gotten older, I appreciate what the gave me more than I did even back then. Like I said, they weren’t perfect and had their own issues, but they made sure I was given such great support and love. Doris


  5. Absolutely beautiful and inspiring, Doris! The quotes you provided, from the start and into what you remember your parents saying, are SO WONDERFUL! Thank you for this look into your life and your reflections, and thank you for your encouragement — you’ve given us “a-ha moments” to consider and be inspired by!


    1. Thank you Gayle. I was one lucky lady..and continue to be with all the wonderful people who have come into my life. Doris


  6. A lovely post, Doris and I so agree about taking the responsibility for decisions made. I think, in general, people nowadays are too inclined to forget that and to find reasons to blame others. Your parents sound remarkable to have been around.


    1. They were Nancy. Despite having problems of their own, they were there for my brother and I. They are no longer with us, but the memories and the gift of personal responsibility will remain forever. It was one of the most precious gifts. Doris


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