Trust by Erin Farwell

IMG_3021_1There have been a lot of comments in social media lately about selecting a “word of the year,” something to reflect on during the coming months. Joy, commitment, compassion, and love are words that various friends and acquaintances have selected as their personal “word for the year.” At first, I found this practice a bit odd. What benefit would I receive from having a specific word to meditate on during the coming year? On closer examination of the process, I realize that it is more than that. It is about seeking out, noticing, or sharing that emotion or action on a daily basis. Still, this word thing wasn’t for me.

Trust.

The word “trust” keeps popping into my thoughts and I’ve begun to ask myself why. I think I’m a trustworthy person. I trust my spouse, child, family, and friends. What does trust have to do with my life?

Then I considered all the things I don’t trust. I don’t trust that my husband and I will be able to sort out our finances. I don’t trust that the last bits of the house re-do will ever be finished. I don’t trust that I’m good enough to take my freelance writing career to the next level. I don’t trust that I have enough time to finish my second novel, continue freelance writing, and meet all of my other responsibilities.

I don’t trust that I’m good enough, yet I don’t trust that anyone else can do the task either. I try to do everything, adding stress to my life and trust-and-content-marketingthat of my family. I don’t ask for help as much as I could, as I don’t always trust the other person to meet their obligation or do it the “right” way. I live in a whirlwind of stress and action, trying to fix problems, address needs, and complete projects, yet I never trust that it is, or ever will be, enough.

So now I ask: How would my world be different if trust became a daily part of my life? I suspect I would sleep better, trusting that the actions I’ve taken or processes I’ve set in motion will serve their intended purpose. I would send off freelance pieces and expect a positive response rather than worry about potential rejection. I would be more at ease with trust_actionmyself, my family, and my world if I could trust that all will be well.

Or maybe it is more important to trust that all is well. Right here and now, despite all the messiness of my life, all is well. There are things to do, concerns that exist, but if I can trust that all is well then I can see my challenges as goals to meet and not obstacles to overcome. If I could trust that needs will be met, problems will be solved, and my life will unfold as it should, what an amazing year I would have.

Despite my resistance to the idea, my word of the year is “trust.” Do you have one?

You can learn more about me at:

http://www.erinfarwell.com
https://www.facebook.com/erin.farwell.5
https://www.amazon.com/author/erinfarwell
http://www.goodreads.com/Erin50
http://www.pinterest.com/erinfarwell

ShadowlandsAHE New Cover8149g0+Rz-L._SL1500_

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18 Responses to Trust by Erin Farwell

  1. I don’t have a word of the year, but I certainly hope you can learn to be more trusting. As a caregiver, I had to trust others to do for my late husband what I could not. Without their help, I wouldn’t have been able to care for him at home.

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  2. Wranglers says:

    I have a Bible verse for the year. Every New Year’s Day I open the Bible and find a verse on the two pages that I am looking at, skipping the begats. LOL This could be your Verse (Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight. … Proverbs 3:5-6New International Version (NIV)) For years I tried to do everything, work, clean, help with homework, run kids around, and every other little thing. Now my husband sweeps the floors and does the laundry. Before the kids left home they loaded the dishwasher or washed dishes by hand, dusted, and did laundry. If they didn’t get their chores finished they didn’t go to the Mall or wherever on Friday. I didn’t keep threatening them, but when it came time for them to do something special, we didn’t do it until their rooms were cleaned or whatever. You cheat your husband and your daughter by not letting them help. When my husband makes the bed, the comforter is crooked, and the pillows are out of whack, but I just smile and look the other way. The same with the laundry. I hang most things, so they get hung straight from the dryer, they may be inside out or crooked, but again, I just turn my head. Sometimes, I’ll say help me with the laundry or whatever–and then I’ll say, “This is a better way to hang that or if we hang it this way it won’t get wrinkled. Sorry, I’ve gone on way too long. I pray that all your things get finished, your finances straighten out, you get plenty of freelance writing, and you get some help. If things get done, don’t sweat the small things or the imperfections. Cher’ley

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    • erinfarwell says:

      Thanks, Cher’ley. I appreciate your thoughtful response to my post. I will keep the bible verse in my heart and try to delegate more. And you’re right – getting it done is more important than perfection. Thank you my friend.

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  3. Doris says:

    Believe it or not, I usually trust that things are unfolding as they should and all will be taken care of. Do I always feel that way? No. Still when I get out of my way, things usually do follow the correct path. Trust is a great word. If you don’t mind, I will also adopt that one.

    Best to you and I know things will happen as they should, and that you will find that balance and trust. Doris

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  4. sstamm625 says:

    Lovely, heartfelt post, Erin. I have trouble trusting too and worry about many of the same things you mention. In some ways, my focus on balance for the year is about trusting as well, I think. Trusting that living in a way that balances the different parts of life I need to feed me will work for the best, instead of thinking I should be putting all my efforts into one part (say, the writing or work) until all is settled enough to “deserve” the other pieces. We are worthy of balance and peace now–no matter what. Trust is a good word for the year. May it manifest for you, my friend–and for all of us.

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  5. Mike Staton says:

    Interesting idea… coming up with one word as a symbol of one aspect of one’s life he or she would want to improve. Right now, though, I can’t settle on that word. Can’t even concentrate enough to think of some words to cull down to just one. Maybe “choice,” meaning I make the right choices in 2015.

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    • erinfarwell says:

      Mike, I wasn’t sure about this whole word thing but I found the right one for me. Choice could be a good word – I can see it being about making the right choices but it could also be about realizing that we have more choices than we realize. Just a thought. Good luck and may 2015 be a great year for you.

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  6. Great post Erin. I’ve never thought of making a word your New Year’s resolution. I, too, can identify with the word Trust, but like Cherley I think I’ve made some strides in that area. My husband loads the dishwasher wrong, hangs up clothes out of the washer but forgets to hang them on the seam and they look all wonky when you put one on, he washes pans, etc., but after he puts them away I can never find them again, and he makes the bed, leaving lots of wrinkles and forgets to put all the pillows back on. In this year of coping with Mental Illness, I was sitting at my computer one day and had an epiphany. I had to “trust” him and all the other well-meaning friends to do things for me, even if it was their way and not mine. It’s amazing that I can now even leave the bed unmade for a day, leave work unaccomplished to sit and read for a few minutes or chat with my husband. I’ve learned never to say a word, but instead, be thankful for the help, no matter how it gets done. This has been a year of re-learning for me. I am a perfectionist, so to let things go that I’ve always kept up was very hard. With a lot of meditation and prayer I’ve been able to do it. However, I think my word for 2015 is self-confidence. I’ve been working on it for awhile but I’m not there. There may be hope for me yet!

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    • erinfarwell says:

      Thanks, Linda. I appreciate your support and experience and I clearly need to catch up with you and Cher’ley on the trust issue. As for self-confidence, I see you as strong, capable, and creative. I realize you had a challenging year last year so maybe this is where your feelings are coming from. Whatever the basis, may you find your self-confidence in this coming year.

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  7. Neva Bodin says:

    I am so much richer from belonging to this blogging family! Love the transparency and helpful thoughts and blogs. Love the bible verse too Cherley. I have challenges coming up with caring for my sister’s health and business when it is clear she needs help but used to doing her own thing. I have other challenges this year and need to trust that He will bring me through it. Also, I wish I had learned to be tolerant of others helping earlier in my marriage! That I’m sure is a confidence issue also. I have learned to scrape off foods still on the washed dish, not worry how straight the bedding is, or look in the corners also, something I wish I could impart to all young brides. Trust is a good word to meditate on!

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  8. S. J. Brown says:

    I don’t have a word for the year. I don’t think one word could be adequate for an entire year. So far 2015 is going much better than last year and I hope it will continue to be a good year for all of us.

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  9. Nancy Jardine says:

    I haven’t thought about a word for the year, but mine would be kind of similar to yours except it will be ‘hope’, closely followed by ‘believe it will happen’. I think your word trust has a lot of positive ‘hope’ in it as well. Mine will also be quite pragmatic, like SJ, in that one word won’t suffice and ‘deal with what happens when it happens’ will rule. I had some family sadness last year that we’ve had to deal with (still are dealing with ie a brother -in law’s death) and that sadness isn’t going away soon, but we have to move on and love the great times we shared with him.

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  10. Lovely post, Erin. I think trust is hard for a lot of people, especially when hearts have been broken and trust betrayed in the past and when many of us are taught to be self-sufficient. Yet, isn’t it wonderful to discover friends and family who do care and have our best interests at heart? We could all use more trust in our lives and I hope yours continues to grow … and the same for all of us.

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  11. Kathy says:

    At first, the idea of having a word for the year awakened the cynicism that probably comes from years of depression–yeah, right, like those trite little affirmations that are supposed to make people feel so much better, blahblahblah, etc. But the rest of your post convinced me that meditating on one word could be a valuable exercise, so I choose the word _grace_. I think of both sides–accepting grace and sharing it–and of all the words bound up in it–beauty, balance, love, charity, mercy, goodness, compassion, serenity, forgiveness, courtesy, civility, peace . . . The word gives me a feeling of tranquility and calm, something I don’t come by naturally.

    Thank you for your post.

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